Chapter 57: 57

James’s POV

"Chloe"

"Chloe"

"Wait for me!!!"

"Chloe"

"I know you are listening to me so please stop!!"

I kept on calling her but she was not responding. She didn’t even bother to look at me once. I felt an ache when she decided to walk away when she saw me there. I never had the urge to get anything the way my heart craved for her.

"Chloe!!!"

"If you don’t stop there I will jump from the building", I tried to stop her by threatening but to my surprise, her feet stopped.

She turned toward me and said, "Why will you jump?"

"Because of you?" I said.

"Because of me?"

"Is this a new way to trick me?" she asked.

"Trick?"

"Yes trick or you just planning to again put all the blame on me right?" she asked while I took my feet toward her.

"Stay there!!" her voice was strict.

"Don’t come closer to me because I don’t want to ", she said.

"Chloe, listen to me!!!" my voice was loud.

"Listen? To what? What do you want me to listen to?" she asked.

When she asked I stayed silent. I too don’t know what to say when I’m telling her to listen. What should I even say? Should I clarify what happened years ago? Should I just tell her I love her? Should I?

"Tell me!!! I’m waiting!! You told me right, you want me to listen to you? Then do it but fast because I have classes", she said while I slowly opened my lips.

"I don’t know what to say but all I want to say is that I love you. I am truly madly in love with you", I again stayed silent as I said.

I didn’t say anything to anger her further but waited for her to answer me when I heard her laugh. I raised my head and looked at her while she kept on laughing. The corner of her eyes was wet but her laugh didn’t stop.

"Love? Are you kidding me? Didn’t you get anyone to fool this morning so you ended up coming for me? Or just you didn’t get anyone till now who can fool you the way you did to me?" instantly her eyes looked at me full of anger.

"Chloe, it’s not!!!"

"Then what?"

"I truly wonder how you even remember my name till now when you must have lots of options for you", a smirk left her lips making me numb.

I couldn’t feel my body anymore the way her works kept on piercing through my skin giving me the same treatment I once gave her. Did she feel the same pain when I told her that day how could she even imagine me loving her? Did she?

I don’t know but it is hell painful which is making me unable to breathe.

"Chloe", I tried to take her name but my legs made me fall on the ground near her feet.

"Don’t you dare act with me because I no longer want to fall for your lie the way you did back then? So get up and leave this much of your act is enough for me to see your colours. And I m no longer interested in seeing all of your virtues when it is disgusting", she said and I can see she is about to turn but my hand didn’t even reach near her.

My legs gave up completely while my eyes kept on closing. I couldn’t breathe and it was painful for me.

Chloe

Chloe

Chloe

All I want is to take her name and say to be with me.

All I want is her.

I slowly closed my eyes. I couldn’t see anything. The entire surface is dark for me which reminds me of the time I stayed with mom.

Mom, I’m scared.

I’m scared as if I became a monster without me knowing.

I slowly closed my consciousness.

After a while

I opened my eyes but I find myself in the same dark place I find myself after meeting with Chloe.

Why am I here?

I run around to find a way for me but everything is dark as if they keep on coming toward me to eat as their snack.

"Anyone here!!"

"Anyone!!"

"Is there any way for me to leave this place?"

I asked numerous times but I didn’t get any answer but somehow I felt as if someone was pulling my hands. I couldn’t see the person but the way he is pulling my hand I can imagine he is a little boy and his fingers are small as well.

"Who are you?" I asked.

As I asked, the dark scenario vanished from my eyes and a shining surface landed in front of me which made me see the guy who was holding my hand. And it was none other than my younger self.

"You", I called him.

"Why are you here?" I asked.

"Ah, I’m scared", he replied to me in a low tone.

"Scared? Why?" I asked.

"The place I’m staying is just too huge and everyone kept on looking at me with scary eyes which terrified me so I came here to hide so that no one could find me. And that is how I found you", he said while playing with my fingers.

"James, how old are you?" I asked.

"Iii... I’m five years old", he shuttered.

"Where is your mom?" I asked.

"Mooomm hatttesss meee", he was about to cry hearing about this but I don’t know why I have zero memory of this time.

I bent down and looked at the little version of me. I can see he is so little. His bones were showing. His eyes filled with tears and fear as if he is too frightened to talk about the thing he has felt.

"James, won’t you tell me?" I asked again when his tears ended up coming out of his eyes, making my throat dry. I could feel the same sorrowful sensation on my throat which made my eyes teary as well.

"Boohoo, everyone hates little James."

"Mom hates me."

"And dad brought me to a weird place where all people look at me with weird eyes which is terrifying."

"Yesterday I met a guy like me talking with a woman inside a room so I walked inside to ask him to play with me but the boy looked at me as if he would kill me."

"He was so scary yet so pretty", he said.

I clenched my fist.

Yeah the moment I met him I too felt he was just so pretty. So dazzling and so pure which is my duty to protect him but-

"I wanted to play with my pretty brother. I wanted to talk with him but he didn’t want to."

"He pushed me out of the room and locked the door."

"The woman who was inside the room was so pretty as well but she has wrinkles on her face as if she is sick and now she is getting treated just like my mom has but mom never smiled looking at me the way that pretty woman did."

"You know I felt butterflies on my stomach seeing them as if I’m looking at angles", he was crying yet his voice sounds so pure. Was I ever this much pure the way he is?

I don’t know where things went wrong.

Why did I change?

When did I start behaving like trash?

When?

"James", he called out my name.

"Hm", I answered.

"Why are you not smiling anymore?" I was shocked.

"Why are you having such a sad expression on your face?"

"Did you meet that pretty boy who was in that room? Did you talk with the pretty lady? Or did you meet another angel who I never met or saw in my entire life", his conversation made me smile.

"Yeah I did meet an angel but I couldn’t grasp her the way you wanted to hold on to that sick pretty lady", I ruffled his hair.

"Why? Why didn’t you hold on to her?"

"Don’t you like her? The way I like?" His questions are hurting me as well, making me realise just how much of a jerk I am.

"I do like her but-

"But?"

"She is not mine anymore."

"I was the one who pushed her away from my side when she was trying to be with me. I said lots of mean words to her which I could never bear if someone said the same to me. But I did say to her. So I’m nothing but a jerk."

"I keep on hurting her everytime I see her."

"I’m not good the way you are ."

"You and I are not the same anymore."

"I’m no longer sweet as you who wants to be with everyone even though it hurts. But I became someone who was to hurt others in order to be happy."

"I’m just a trash."

Source: Webnovel.com, updated by Aunomay