Chapter 65: 65

"I’m real", I said while hugging him.

"No no, it can’t be-

He pushed me away.

"You can’t be real."

"You never let me touch you unless it’s a fight."

"You always despise me for stealing your place because we were both born at the same time."

"You always hated me because of how dad treated me but not you so you couldn’t be real but my illusion of mine", he kept on blabbering while I hugged him again.

I know I never acted him in a good way. From the moment I know hi. I always walked away whenever I see him so it is natural for him to behave like this. I know I have brought this on myself but I don’t want him to behave like this.

I kept on patting his head while I felt all of sudden his hand slowly wrapping around me making me flinch.

"Ouch", I reacted.

"What happened?"

"Are you hurt?"

"Let me see!!!" he said and removed my shirt making my back turn toward him.

"It is-

He stopped but I instantly wore my shirt and acted as if nothing happened.

"It is what dad.... Did it?" he hesitated.

I stayed silent.

"It all happened because of me right?" again with his self-blame.

"I know all of this happened because of me. If I would have never ever lost my control while talking with Chloe and fallen on them, nothing would have happened to you."

"It is all my freaking fault this happened with you."

I tried to stop him but kept on blabbering on his own making me get any.

"Is it not your fault!!!!" I shouted.

"What-

He stopped.

"I said it is not your freaking fault you god damn!!"

"It was never your fault but I did this on my own."

"If I could have stopped myself that day then I would have never gone near you but I did because I was too scared when I got Chloe’s call. When she was saying you are unconscious for long I panicked and ran to see you."

"I knew that I could never control the situation so I begged grandfather to inform dad and he came. And it was reasonable too how he blamed me."

"It was justified as I always beat you making you bleed so it is not your fault", all this time I was holding his palms together. And this is the first time I ever came so freaking close to him while talking about something.

" No, no matter what you say it’s not true."

He said.

He looked like a child like this.

I don’t know how much I remembered about childhood but yeah I remember once he was standing near mom’s room. He was like a little lamb back then. I could see his ears when he was standing at the door. It was so refreshing and cute but still, I refused to go near him.

Because before that I once saw my father hugging another woman in the garden. I didn’t know what was that but all I could see when I saw them in the garden through my mom’s window was standing beside me while her tears kept on dripping down her eyes even though she was not bawling her eyes out like me nor she complained.

"Mom, why are you crying?" I asked her while pulling her dress but she didn’t speak.

She kept on looking through the window while my eyes followed her as well.

I saw how dad and that woman were arguing. Dad kept on cupping her face but she was pushing him, hitting him, and slapping him which my mother never did. Not that but I never even saw my mother touch my father which was too painful for me.

After 3 years of my birth, I decided to talk with all and spend time slowly but I once heard the maids talking.

"Don’t you think after the birth of the young master the relationship between the master and mistress changed?"

"Yeah, I felt too."

"Before his birth, there were not too many romantic moments but there was a time when the master got drunk and the mistress used to bring him home supporting him and we could see them having breakfast and the master did sometimes make requests to prepare her favourite dishes as well."

"Yeah, I even once saw the master kissing mistress when I was crossing the room."

"But now those romances are nowhere to be seen."

"Master didn’t even come into the room while the mistress stopped coming out of her room."

"Yeah if the young master was never born....

Yeah, there are times when I wish to mumble if I was never born then these things would have never happened. If I would have never been born then mom wouldn’t have cried but laughed genuinely but now when I’m here mom doesn’t smile.

"Aaron"

"Aaron"

"Aaron"

Ah

I came out of my dreams.

"Aaron, what has gotten to you?" James asked.

"Ah no I was thinking of something", I said but I couldn’t concentrate on what he was saying.

"Do you regret talking with me?" he asked.

"Regret?"

"I won’t say I regret or what but you say what do you and how do you want me to behave in this messed up relationship of ours?"

"I don’t know what you think of me and my head mother but you think if your mother were in my mother’s place and I would be in your place what would be your reaction? Would you like me? Would you come to me and say brother let’s play?"

I wasn’t saying anything violent but I said it in a calm tone.

"No, I could have never", his answer was instant.

"So yeah I do take time too. But I don’t blame you for my situation", I said and stayed silent.

"Again!! Could you tell me what happened?" he asked, making me laugh.

"I couldn’t find Ayla", I said.

He stayed silent when I laughed again.

"I know she is the same Ayla so you don’t have to think much", I answered while he was still looking at me with shocked eyes.

"How did you-

"That’s not the issue but a big misunderstanding happened which made her vanish", my facial expression changed.

"What?"

He asked while I started explaining how Chloe lied to me regarding her. How Chloe lied to me was an important thing which I needed to know the most. I told him how Chloe misunderstood and grandfather also played a big role in it.

"She was not at her usual place?" he asked.

"No, she wasn’t ."

"It already has been six months and she left the place before six months so I could no longer even think where she went. And I don’t have the guts to lose her again", I said.

"What if she comes to her home?" as he said I looked at him.

"Home? Where did she stay?" I asked.

"Yes yes, the place where she was staying when she was a teen", he said.

"She would be there you sure?"

"I’m not sure but I hope she comes here", he said while both of us ran downstairs.

While I was following my eyes fell on dad who looked away from me as if he was holding guilt but I don’t care. He doesn’t deserve my forgiveness. I followed him toward the parking place and took the car but he stopped.

"I have a bike", he said while making me sit in the back seat.

I have no idea how many years have passed and how long it has been since I came here. I even forgot her house route but he knows well and he drove me there.

My heart was thumping loud.

"She will be there right?" I felt as if someone whispered in my ears.

"Aaron, we reached", he said while I instantly ran and knocked on the door.

I don’t know when I even ended up coming here but I don’t care as long as I can have her. As long as I can love her I don’t care about anything.

I was thinking when the door slowly opened.

"A...

I stopped.

"Jace?" I called.

"Yeah? You?" he asked.

"I...

I was about to say when James stopped me.

"You know me right?" I saw Jace’s angry expression while I ran inside.

"Hey, where are you going?" Jace shouted at me but I didn’t stop.

I saw Mr White but I didn’t care but ran toward her room as James told me.

"Dad, stop him!!!" Jace shouted but James and Mr White stopped him.

"Let him be", Mr White said.

"Dad, what are you doing?" Jace struggled.

"Because I know why he came here so let him be because -

"Because?" James said.

"He won’t find what he came to find", he said, making my feet stop in the middle of the stairs.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"You came for Ayla right?"

I nodded.

"She is not here anymore."

"You came so late", as he said I ended up losing hope.

Source: Webnovel.com, updated by Aunomay