Chapter 67: 67

I almost read the diary till the end. I have no idea how long it has been but it sure is late. But after reading the diary I have lots of questions going on in my mind.

Happiness she wanted to share? What was it? Is it about our identity which I too wanted to tell her? Or there is something else besides this.

I don’t know.

All I can see is that I’m the one who hurt her so much.

If I only could have ignored going there and told dad instead nothing would have occurred. If only I could have woken up earlier then she wouldn’t be able to tolerate this. I know my explanation will never make her happy but it sure would be painful to see me would someone else right?

"What if I find her with someone else?"

I clenched my fist as I thought.

No, I could never bear the scene. I could never see her holding on to someone other than me. I could never see her with someone touching her. It sure is unbearable for me.

I was thinking when I heard a knock on the door.

I walked outside when I found James.

"Shall we go?" he asked.

I wasn’t able to say I wanted to stay here but walked downstairs with him but when I left the place I felt a scared feeling growing inside me.

"Is this the end?"

"Are we going to part ways like this?"

"Did I push her to this stage where I wasn’t even able to see her again?"

Thoughts kept on lingering in my head when I turned and see while I found Mr White sitting on the couch while his brows frowned. I know he sure is hurting inside and I can never go and tell him don’t be worried I will find her when I can’t. I can’t even say everything will be solved when I know all of this happened because of me.

As I kept my feet outside of the place my legs gave up as if I was acting brave till now. My legs kept on shivering.

"You ok?" he asked but I couldn’t utter a single word.

"Aaron!!"

"Aaron!!"

He kept on calling my name but my eyes closed, which is me without knowing.

***

"Aaron"

"Aaron"

"Aaron"

I kept on hearing his voice when I slowly opened my eyes. I felt as if I only blinked my eyes and the morning took overnight.

"Aaron!!"

"You ok!!"

It was James.

I woke up and sat.

"Wasn’t I standing in front of her house?" I asked.

"Yeah but it was last night and I took you home afterwards", he replied.

"Last night?"

"Yeah it’s already been more than twelve hours since you were sleeping", he said.

"And yeah some people came to meet you", as he said I saw grandfather and Chloe coming through the door holding a flower making me frown.

"This must be a dream, right?"

I laughed.

"Aaron!!" James called my name again.

"Ha ha yeah, it was the same way I woke up after six months. It was the same when she came through the door holding a flower bouquet placed in my room and she is doing the same as if it’s still the same day when I felt the nightmare right?" I kept on rambling.

"Aaron, it’s not", James tried to control me but my anger was burning.

"Why the hell did you come here?" I shouted. I can see Chloe flinching but I don’t give a shit about it.

I don’t fucking care any longer.

"Aaron!!" she called my name with her gentle and sweet voice which is only making me angry more than usual.

"Don’t you dare call my name!! Don’t fucking take it because you already messed up my entire world the moment you step onto my life!!" As I said I noticed James barely hanging on to his anger but I didn’t stop.

"James, I know your relationship with her but I’m not angry with her because of the misunderstanding but what she did made her leave me."

"She fucking ruined my life!!!"

"She used me to get revenge on you!!!"

"I now couldn’t even believe what she must have felt when she found me held by some other girl who she had no idea. How she must have felt when she was holding me when I wasn’t even wearing anything. How she must have felt when she came to know that Ayla was not my first love but Chloe when it is made up. Tell me how the hell you want me to behave when my life turns upside down in just a brief minute."

"It must be a blink of an eye for me ."

"It must be a brief moment for them."

"But for Ayla, it changed her life."

"She left the place where I could have found her."

"Her number is out of reach ."

"And I don’t fucking know where she is!!"

They are still standing near the room while I am rambling about what I feel. Grandfather didn’t utter a single idea but I know what must be going on with him. He sure is thinking as I will forget her soon and marry him according to him but I know what to do. I will be a complete narcissist which they could have never expected.

"You wanted me to marry her right?" I said James and Chloe raised their head.

No one said anything.

"Yeah, I will do it."

"I will do it."

"Aaron!!" Chloe called out.

"No no you should call me darling from now on. Isn’t it what you wanted to do? Being my wife? Then do it. I gave you the entire order so prove it that you are perfect for my wife", I no longer look at them with the gentle expression which I always do but this time my eyes look down lowering the size of my eyes.

James didn’t say a word but I’m sure there will be a time he will say it.

I waited.

"James, say something!!!" Chloe took the initiative.

"James, why are you being silent? Tell him that I don’t want to marry him!! Tell him what our relationship is!!! Tell him God damn it!!" she was clearly begging as well as showing her anger while I was only enjoying her miserable situation.

"You know what when the incident appeared in the school I truly thought it was my fault but he clearly mentioned that he did that because of me when I know it wasn’t not entirely still I blamed myself for a while why did you suffer for me but now I clearly am liking the way you are doing this."

"The thing you did to me is nothing in comparison to what happened because of me."

"You know what it took me six years to find her, falling in love with her again but you didn’t take a brief moment to destroy them. Are you a born vixen?"

James clenched his fist.

"Tell me, did you clearly plan all this?"

"Tell me you didn’t know her when you came out of my room and stood in front of her when you saw the picture made up by James?"

"Tell me you didn’t!!!"

"Tell me you fucker!!!!"

I was clearly shouting when I felt a harsh slap landing on me.

"Aaron, stop it!!!" Finally, James spoke.

"I don’t think I could handle any more than this."

"I’m not blaming you for anything. I’m not blaming anything at all but hearing like this from you sure is making my heart ache. It is so refreshing and painful hearing you calling her meanest words which I could never hear", I heard him say but I don’t blame him.

"James", Chloe called out his name in a soft tone.

"Don’t take my name as I should remind you that for you I m got even a human", he said.

What is he saying? I don’t understand.

"Ja-

She tried to call out his name but he walked away while Chloe followed him.

My grandfather stayed in my room without saying anything. The same goes for me as well. Even if I needed to say something, I couldn’t. How could he even say she wasn’t my first love? How could he know how broken I was when I left this city? No, not even this city but I shifted to another county trying to live alone.

How could he?

There are times when I wasn’t even able to sleep but cried all night calling her night. There were times when I kept on holding my chest trying to forget her which made me think of taking psychotherapy but I dropped the idea when I started sleeping around. But now I’m sure I will be taking therapy for sure.

I could never tolerate the pain which I handled before.

It is painful which is making me hard to breath.

Source: Webnovel.com, updated by Aunomay